Time to move on...

since coco's passing, i've been absolutely inconsolable. bad enough i was detoxing from a bipolar medicine that had adverse reactions with my brain chemistry. so sad tina + tina not on meds + dead coco = insane/suicidal tina. how's that for basic math?
well i'm on prozac again for the millionth time. and i think i'll see through this life for a bit...see what it has to offer. besides, laura is visiting on the 7th and i have to live through that at least.
i still cry everyday though. austin is a close knit town and alot of people knew coco, so i get the "how's coco?" question every other day. i have been avoiding some places like sugar mama's (best cupcakes in austin). they had pupcakes there once and the whole store loved coco.
anywho...i think i'll do a little rant first.
Why Oh Why do you pick me to do tattoo work that looks nothing like my style and preference when i specifically write on the web site hey, if my stuff is like what you're into call me! i don't display things i don't do/ don't like to do on my website. really...I DO THIS ON PURPOSE!!!

and this is what i would buy if i had like 10 thousand dollars to spend , but it had to be a purse.


and here are some happy pictures to share:

my camille rose garcia limited vinyls


picture of jeremy enigk and the fact that i just saw the sunny day real estate reunion.


hysterical picture of allan when we first hung out.


me and amalie goofing in the bathroom.


my gangstas, skittles, tin-man, and jew jew bee.


besties



hysterical cutouts from the onion.

Good Night.

SHE WENT BACK TO HEAVEN...

i took her from a bunch of no good nothings. their house was filthy. they said she was perfectly healthy, except they couldn't give her the constant attention she needed cause she was so tiny. i brought her home and the very next morning she went into hypoglycemic shock. i didn't even know what that was. she stayed at the emergency animal hospital with a needle drip stuck in her neck for 3 days. i was told she was malformed because whoever bred her too small. the doctor said she will have medical problems that included not being able to walk/walk well, constant hypoglycemia, and probably seizures in the future. but she was going to be okay for now and wasn't in any kind of pain. i thanked God because i was in love from the moment i laid eyes on her.
believe it or not, she grew from being able to fit in the palm of my hand to two cupped hands. i bought her a baby playpen for the house. it was like a little room for her that was kept in the living room at all times. she was my baby. her food was stored in baby snack cups and i fed her with baby spoons. she had baby receiving blankets and a tiny bed. til she could feed herself during the night, i got up several times to make sure she ate. sometimes i went crazy with the lack of sleep and i sympathized with my fellow friends who were mothers. she went to work with me everyday and where ever i went, she went. grocery store, video store, shopping for clothes...even on two trips, one of which was a one year wedding anniversary getaway.
coco passed away in her sleep 2 days ago. i got up and called out her name in a sing-song way like i do every morning. then i go check on her. usually she stares at me with her too big for her head eyes and makes a feisty motion. this morning she did not. she was curled up in her sleeping position, her eyes open...but her body hard and cold like ice. i thought at first she wasn't feeling well and needed some honey to get her blood sugar up. i kept petting her and calling her name. but she was gone.
coco has been with me everyday since march of this year. i feel hollow and my heart hurts so much.
coco used to "bark" like a squeeky toy.
coco liked to pretend she was ferocious.
coco bit my fingers with her tiny fish-like teeth.
coco sometimes wore a little red cowboy hat.
coco napped with me and snuggled on my neck.
coco knew i was her mama.
we buried her by the birdbath wrapped in a blanket with a sprig of flowers and the photobooth pictures she and i took together at the g&s lounge.
she seemed healthy, ate well, and played well that i did not see this coming. i just think her tiny organs gave out. but her little heart will always be with me and she will always have a piece of mine.
Rest in Peace little coco-la, and say hi to roxy for me.
love,
your mama

Latest from my gals at 666 and stuff...

Gayla and Lisa came through again. I know you can't tell from the photo shoots and all the other pictures I take of myself, but I really don't have alot of confidence. I'm not usually very photogenic. I thank God for the invention of the Mac photobooth. I can get a pretty good angle with those. Want to know why all the myspace and facebook pictures are taken by people from above? Cause it's a freaking flattering angle! No big secret there! Alexis and I scream at people to get on top of a chair before taking our picture. I would like to do another shoot with 666. I was thinking a Mark Ryden inspired St.Sebastian theme with me covered in bloody arrows surrounded by rabbits and toys. Or as a marionette doll held up by strings and ribbons.
I recently strayed from 666 and payed a dear price. I ended up looking like what Roger called "a Mexican midget tranny". The place didn't have a single mirror, so I trusted the pros. I came home with a thumb drive of some pics taken that day and i bawled. I didn't go into work. Tina the Tranny stayed home and cried all day.

So here are some books I've read lately:
The Road by Cormac McCarthy
The Informers by Bret Easton Ellis

I loved The Road and I'm sure I will hate the movie. I had tears in my eyes the whole time i read it. I think fathers and sons especially should read it together.
The Informers was pretty good. The movie was nothing like the book, and it was sooo bad! Maybe if they included the vampires...

New/Not So New Shows I've been watching out of interest or sheer boredom:
True Blood - Love it
ANTM - Train wreck
Project Runway - Love it
Vampire Diaries - Train wreck

And now a confession...I love Phil Collins. There.

I've gotta do this more often...

Well I think my problem is that I feel I have to have lots of pictures to accompany my blog. Amalie's blog gives me a complex with all her beautiful photos. But if this is a journal of sorts I think I should be easier on myself.

So my obsession right now is the new fall line purse from Marc Jacobs. It's called Petal to the Metal Sacha. Ilove the two gold bird harware on the front. But my only ambivalence towards this gorgeous purse is "is it too tattoo-y?" Coming from a tattoo artist and a heavily tattooed one at that, it might seem like a weird question. But I have to say that the whole Ed Hardy/Old school tattoo design craze has left a bad taste in my mouth. When Roger and I were in South Padre, we entered a beach store that had all that which is Hardy. Sunglasses, beer coozies, ashtrays, body boards....everything. I'm sick of seeing tattoo images plastered on just anything. What next? Let me guess Ed Hardy Pampers for babies and Ed Hardy Depends for senior citizens.